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30 Days of Night (2007)

No, this is not another sequel in the 28 Days Later series, contrary to what many people seem to think about this movie. This is a movie based on the Dark Horse graphic novel "30 Days of Night" by Steve Niles. I never read the graphic novel, because my comic book nerd skills have been in a steady but constant decline since I graduated from art school 3 years ago. I swear, in 2002 I went to Big Apple Con in NYC and held a fascinating conversation for like half an hour with Evan Dorkin about what comics we like, and now I don't have a lick of background knowledge on this kick-ass vampire movie because I've been cocky enough to actually have a life, GAWD where do I get off?!?

Luckily my buddy who escorted me to the theater is dorky enough to have read the graphic novel, and he told me that the movie stays pretty true to the book, especially in the ending which is always important. It gives me cinematic blue balls when I go to see a movie version of a book expecting the "everybody dies tragically" ending of the book only to see some disney-fied ending where the hero carries everyone safely from danger at the last second. Not that this happens in this movie. Or does it? I'm not telling you, go see it yourself. Or stay cooped up in your mom's basement and read the graphic novel, whichever is your style.

So anyways: this movie is good, all fans of bloody violent movie deaths should go see it. The vampire make-up is good, the cinematography is good, the ways in which people and vampires die are creative and therefore good. Overall it was thoroughly enjoyable. Especially the scene where Josh Hartnett kills a vampire by punching through his mouth and out the back of his head, during which my friend and I cheered out loud in the theater.

Now on to my favorite bit: the complaints! Let's have a list:

1. This movie does have some slow parts, but I think that's understandable since it's supposed to take place in one of the most isolated towns in the US. The action scenes peppered throughout the film are good enough that they make up for the boring parts.

2. Josh Hartnett is a bad actor, but it's okay because he's so durn good-looking. I'll watch Josh Hartnett pretend to be a sheriff any day.

3. Melissa George's character is not very believable. I just can't buy a waify blonde girl as a fire marshall who grew up in Barrow, Alaska. And whenever sh** goes down in this movie, she kind of doesn't do anything. I hate it when women act worthless in horror films. In real life, Melissa George was a champion rollerskater as a teenager! Perhaps if she had been on wheels she could've taken out some vampires.

4. There is zero chemistry between Josh Hartnett and Melissa George, who are supposed to be estranged spouses. That whole part of the story feels very forced and unnecessary, although I understand that they wanted to give the hero some depth.

OMG I just looked at a list of horror films that Evan Dorkin likes/hates on his blog. Clearly our opinions differ, can you believe he doesn't like Clive Barker's Nightbreed (1990)?!? It's a good thing we can have an open forum about these things on the interweb and not talk about them in person, because otherwise Evan Dorkin and I would get into a big barfight and I have a feeling I'm way tougher than he is.

Here's a list of Steve Nile's favorite movie vampires, which I find far more satisfying than Evan Dorkin's movie list.