10.20.2007

09

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Flourish (2006)

Just who the hell does Kevin Palys think he is anyways? What business does he have making an interesting movie and then NOT posting his whole life story on the internet for me to read about??? I am offended sir, you have offended me. Oh wait... never mind I just found his life story on the really ugly terrible Flourish movie website, which looks like it was made by a disinterested 12-year-old in an HTML 101 class. User Interface design, ever heard of it? Huh, Kevin Palys?????? I'm sure kids even younger than 12 are learning about HTML already, freaking children and their crazy computer knowledge, it all makes me ill. Sorry I'm a little salty today blogettes, it's 5 o'clock in the evening and I'm still hungover from last night. It's all a blur of tequila shots and broken wine glasses and blood at this point. Ah, good times. Even a delicious garden omelet from the Dish Cafe in Ballard couldn't snap me out of this one, which I ate and enjoyed thoroughly.

So, lesseee here, Kevin Palys, Flourish. I got the feeling while watching this movie that this is a semi-decent first film from a filmmaker that will soon make great movies with a little more practice and some more time and more money. Ugh, my brain is too fuzzy to create any more full sentences, I'm just going to list things that I liked about the movie now. Movie good why now:

- KPdawg creates a weird awkward stuttering world right at the start at sticks with it throughout the film, consistency = good. You don't forget that you are viewing the world through the eyes of a brain damaged main character.

- The aforementioned brain damaged main character, who is played by Jennifer Morrison from House M.D., has really nice toned arm muscles. It's inspired me to go to the gym as soon as my hangover wears off in 12 hours.

- The sound is really well done in this film, it does what sound is supposed to do in movies which is to give the audience a heightened sense of the tone and emotion of a scene a la John Carpenter's Halloween, not just to play a cutesy little song a la Randy Newman, that smarmy oscar-winning jerkpants.

- Ian Brennan, who played Carter/Dr. Carter Kaufman was hilarious in his role as the bumbling criminal boyfriend, and he's kind of cute. I wish he had a photo up on imdb, it makes me feel sad that he doesn't, like his career isn't far along enough yet for anyone to post a photo of him. Apparently Save the Last Dance 2 (2006) doesn't have as strong of a fan base as the original. Someday Ian Brennan, someday...

- "Let's not overreactivate here." Nice faux-elevated vocabulary use with the brain damaged main character KPdawg! I like it, I'm going to start talking like that just to mess with people.

So this movie had some nice things about it, but it was a little slow and a little melodramatic in some places, like in the way overused "she's in a mental hospital and she doesn't even realize it because she's so CAHRAZEE" ending. But in general, I think that KPdawgfaceguy is off to a good start with his first wide release (on video anyways) feature-length film and I predict that more good things will come from him. If you watch this movie and it leaves you craving a more succinct false-memory movie, watch The Machinist (2004). I hate to recommend a big-deal-studio movie over an indie film, but The Machinist is really good modern film noir and it's worth watching just to marvel over how much weight Christian Bale lost for that role, and just how awesome of an actor he is in general. He lost 63 lbs for that movie!!! And just one year later he appeared in Batman Begins all super beefy!!! No wonder I'm in love with that man.

I'm going to go eat flax cereal now, don't pester me you rotten kids.

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